4×03 “Take Me To the King” Part 2
Written by: Chris Coleman, Kristi Clark and Kelly Zollo
Warning: Episode may contain graphic violence, language and sexual content
Theme Song: Leon Bridges-River, Tamela Mann- Take Me To The King, Teedra Moses-Last Day, Marvin Sapp-Never Would Have Made 

Brock had sat through Father Kreja and the pastor from the Baptist church he thought was Elijah Jenkins but he didn’t know him that well.  Both eulogizing his brother and offering comforting words to his family. So far it was a service that respected who his brother was, a son, brother, cousin, surrogate uncle to many the rest to him was white noise. His brother was a good person, probably one of the absolute best that he ever knew, his parents had tried their best to instill that in all of them but Zach lived it. Zach put his life on the line everyday for the greater good, to defend people that couldn’t defend themselves when needed to answer the call. His brother had been ridiculed for it in high school for coming out as not sure which way he loved more men or women. It had been hard and something the family had come to terms with, but he always had his support that was unwavering. The irony of the service taking place at St. Paul was not lost on him seeing how Zach hadn’t set foot in church since Dylan’s baptism.

It seemed church had always been more his Aunt Lauren’s thing and while the Fraiser’s had always been Catholic few of them actually abided by the church or its standards. His grandmother of course being one, he was pretty sure his uncle showed up for points or political clout; it wasn’t like he was above reproach. His aunt though she believed, like really believed in the church and he remembered her coming to pray relentlessly for Vicky after she died. His parents did their best to raise them in the church given his father’s ties to the faith. Though ending up with a bisexual son and lesbian daughter, both his parents left the church about the same time Zach came out and then Kelsey did too. He took a moment to take it all in, looking at all the faces around the church while Father Kreja began to say a prayer, out of habit he bowed his head. Repeating the words as instructed and then realized it was his turn to get up and speak, he gripped Greer’s hand beside him while he walked up the pulpit. Once there he gripped the sides not sure exactly what he was going to say, though he had rehearsed it.

“I think I wrote something down but I’m not sure I can find it. Normally we just like to fly by the seat of our pants.” Brock said, digging around his pockets trying to find the paper, seeing his siblings and cousins, slightly grinning at the reference. Zach was like that flying by the seat of his pants, most Fraiser’s were and as much as his grandfather had a drunk he was one of the best at figuring it out as he went along, flying by the seat of his pants. Eventually he gave up and then looked back at everyone who was there to say goodbye to his brother.

“Zach was my brother, a pain in my ass at times seeing he was a few years younger than me and always trying to tag along with me, Braden, Jon and Devin. Though he eventually fit in with our cousin Dani and her crew, with them often being thick as thieves. But he was my brother, he was the kid that I got to give all my older brother advice too, some he took but often at times he ignored it, wanting to pave his own way. He was always there when our parents needed him to help with an errand or anything they needed and they adored and loved him unconditionally. He was protective especially with those he cared about. Our sisters could tell you that. Mess with them he was sure to show you the door as he kicked your ass on the way out. He loved deeply.” Brock said reaching down and grabbing a tissue from the box on the stage, it was true his brother loved and he loved deeply. Mason of course was the love of his life everyone knew that but he had also loved Dante and in his own messed up way Scarlett Nicholas and he also loved the son he never got to meet.

“I know others like to say they know about love but Zach lived that even when it was hard to do so. He was always different growing up never quite knowing where he exactly fit in with the world but he loved it. He loved being a part of this family, he loved our parents, me, his sisters, his cousins. Along the way he had people come and go out of his life that he loved like Dante Gonzales, Scarlett Nichols but his greatest loves were Mason Delacroix who he married a few weeks ago and Kieran, the son that is still missing that he unfortunately never got the moment to meet. See Zach was bi, it was part of the reason he stopped coming to church, the reason my parents don’t come anymore. He was at peace with that but he loved, he loved so deeply and he stood by that mantra love deeply no matter who it is.” Brock said wiping at the tears in his eyes while he saw his parents do the same and he was transported back to a trip home from college with his brother.

With traffic it had taken him an hour and half to get home in his now paid-for truck and he knew it was going to be rough to tell his parents that he was going to become a firefighter instead. Frankly college just wasn’t his thing it never really was as far as academics go, and he wanted to do something and help people not spend hours in a classroom or years at a school to become a doctor. Closing the door to the truck he grabbed his bag for the weekend and made his way up the front steps stopping when he spotted his baby brother on the porch guitar in hand. He’d heard the rumors even up at campus. Someone had mentioned that they’d seen Zach in a club with Simon Rutherford and it wasn’t really his business, but he wanted to know. Kelsey had called and said that his parents had taken the news hard to the point that they really weren’t speaking to Zach now. Neither of his parents’ cars were in the driveway either meaning both were at work.

“Working on something new? Mom must be at the hospital, Dad’s probably out working too.” Brock asked him, he’d never been musically inclined or talented, that was more so Zach and their cousin Dani. He couldn’t carry a tune in a bucket all the same he watched as Zach continued to strum on the guitar clearly trying to ignore him or whatever it was that was weighing on him. He didn’t quite know what or how to talk to Zach about the rumor that he heard. “So I heard that you were out at a club the other night, clearly underage with Simon Rutherford. So are you like gay?” He said finally deciding that beating around the bush was not the best solution.

Zach placed his guitar down and looked at Brock in his eyes. Placing his hands in his pocket. He didn’t understand why everyone needed to know his sexuality. Why was it anyone’s business? His parents seemed to hate him as if he had ruined the perfect family image. “I’m not gay. I like girls but I also like guys. I’m not afraid of it and I don’t think anyone else should be either. I’m bisexual and I’m sick of hiding these feelings. So this is who I am and if mom and dad kick me out or something it is what it is. If you’re going to fight me or call me a faggot or something do it now. Aunt Lauren said I can stay with her and she isn’t judging me. Not like mom and dad are. They asked me what about Kelsey and Lucy? Like I can rub my sexuality off on them!” He spewed with rage. “I kissed Simon. I like Simon okay? I also like Scarlett, Cat and Esme are hot too. As long as you are pretty well.” He laughed to himself then immediately got serious again. 

“So do you hate me? Are you going to disown me like mom and dad? If so, can you do it tomorrow? I can’t be too much of a disappointment to so many people I love. I mean our parental units think I’m some sick freak or something. So go for it Brock I mean you’re perfect and you gotta be here to say how much of a disappointment I am.” Zach said staring defiantly at his older brother.

Brock looked at him and shrugged so he liked girls and boys in his opinion there wasn’t anything wrong with that, honestly he was surprised their aunt had offered him to move in given how Catholic she was. He didn’t think his parents were going to kick Zach out or anything like that if he had to guess his parents were more upset that he was out drinking and underage than they were about his sexual exploits. They probably wanted to make sure that Zach was setting a good example to their younger sisters, if anything the words Zach was saying was more along the lines his uncle would be spouting. “Ok I don’t hate you or anything. I’m not going to disown you either, I just heard the rumor up at campus that it was going around. Probably where mom and dad heard it too you know that people like to gossip. Simon hangs out with a rougher crowd and you know who I’m talking about, he likes to party hard Simon tags along with Mason in tow. I would like to think you can make good choices, you’re almost out of high school. I mean as long as you are practicing safe relations unless you need another lesson on the birds and the bees.”

“I doubt mom and dad are going to kick you out and are you sure you didn’t hear uncle Walter say something, come on Zach they love you no matter what. If anything they are likely more upset that you went out clubbing for hours, got wasted and came home. That is what they are worried about with Kelsey and Lucy. It’s okay to like who you like and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise, mom and dad included.” Brock said looking at him and hoping that he was right if not he was going to have some very angry and inspired words for both his parents to knock some sense into them. He saw how tore up Zach was and went across the porch hugging his brother because it felt like the right thing to do. “I’ll let you in on a secret. I’m not perfect, not even gonna graduate college, I’m dropping out and signed up for firefighter academy. I’m sure they’ll be clutching their pearls. I won’t have that fancy college education.” Brock said, hoping to ease the mood just a bit.

He smirked when he heard Mr. Perfect was dropping out. It was shocking. However this wasn’t a gleeful moment. His brother was following his own path. As he folded his arms he looked at Brock. “I know about condoms Brock I don’t need a tutorial you know I listened. Plus with the alarming rates of STI’s well I wouldn’t go bare unless it’s my husband or wife. Like could you see me with a child? I mean me?” He laughed as he walked up to his brother and just hugged him. “Thank-you for loving me no matter what bro. You are going to be an amazing firefighter. Maybe I’ll be a cop like I always wanted and you, a firefighter, our parents would have no choice but to stan us.”

“Bro they’ll have to stan us two hot Fraiser men on the prowl they won’t know what hit them. As for you with a kid, like don’t rush into it now I think they’ll handle the entire sexuality thing better than they would a late teen pregnancy.” Brock said letting out a smirk at his brother and pulling Zach into another hug, he was always going to be by Zach’s side as his brother first and love him no matter the circumstances. “I mean it no one’s going to disown you over this and we all love you no matter what. Now let’s head inside so I can be the one to really break their hearts.” Brock said pulling back and opening up the screen door to the house so they could go inside.

“You’re loved little brother so loved.” Brock said, walking to the casket and touching it looking at his parents who had simply broken down in the pew. 

The tears cascading down their faces and he wiped at his own. Not sure what else he could say but none of them had been disowned. If anything the family stood behind both Zach and Kelsey and he knew that was because of the bravery of the little brother who put his life on the line to make sure people were safe making the ultimate sacrifice. He stepped back with a salute and then walked back over to his seat leaning into Greer as she wrapped her arms around him.

**********

Kelsey stood in front of the church and cleared her throat before she began speaking. “As I take in every moment in. Every face here is etched into my heart. Today is the last party I’ll attend with my brother. If you knew Zach, you knew he was the life of the party. My older brother Brock said he never quite fit in and that was half true. Zach was at his best in large settings. Parties, graduations, weddings, and even funerals. When my grandfather died he was the ray of light for all of us, especially my grandmother.” Twisting her cardigan she felt the weight of the world on this moment. She had to send her brother off in class and honor. “I don’t want to posture today and just tell a funny story. I lost my hero. I lost the one person who inspired my every move. As a lesbian woman who hasn’t left the church I understood Zach’s stance. We were taught to love everyone but the gays. I’m not here to bash and understand religion. I’m here to tell you my brother’s faith was broken when he died. He loved singing in the choir and loved God. He just also loved a man and that love broke his connection with a place he truly belonged. My brother had connections to so many people. I mean look around it’s all types of people here today. People he saved, people he loved, and I want you all to remember the love that Zach made you all feel.” 

Taking a deep breath she touched her stomach knowing she’d probably vomit after this was done. “My brother coming out so fearlessly made me know that I could step into my truth. I could be the woman who I was destined to be. I was always strived for perfection. I wanted to be the best and I thought my family wouldn’t love me because of who I loved. That changed when I saw Zach be himself and everyone just didn’t care because it was Zach. The goofy kid they loved didn’t change and it freed me to be me. His bravery freed me to be the woman I am today. I don’t know how I am to live my life as a trailblazer like him. He said he was going to be a cop and he was, he said he wouldn’t hide his sexuality and he didn’t, and for that he will always be my hero. Always brave and ready to face anything. My big brother.” 

Zach folded his arms as he looked over at his sister whose expression said it all. She was crushed and today he had no choice but to be here for her. Prom was important to any teen and here she was all dressed up to go and alone. The so-called girlfriend Courtney was always reluctant with her true feelings for Kelsey. Tonight solidified it for him, this girl didn’t deserve his sister. Was she some kind of joke? His kid sister who had come out behind him and was so much more brave than him. To face coming out after he had and the turmoil that it caused the family. They didn’t even go to church anymore because of how the church reacted to him. “Well it’s been an hour and if you don’t leave soon you’re going to miss your prom Kelsey.”

Flopping on the bed she felt stupid. Courtney just couldn’t face the ridicule of the people of Atlas Falls. Did she love her? Well she thought she did. Zach kept saying that things changed after high school. That felt more real by the day. Courtney was going to Berkley and she was going to NYU for her general education and then she would come home and study medicine in AFU. Looking down at the dress she felt stupid. Dani, her mother, Lucy and aunt Lauren all were here getting her ready and she had no date. “I’m about to take all of this off. There’s no reason to go.” Kelsey said going to the vanity and beginning to remove her lipstick. 
Zach saw how crushed she was. He dated Simon in high school, and he remembered how dramatic that everything was in these years. Considering he was only a few years removed. The academy was rough but he was doing it. Some people were harder on him and it was no doubt because of his sexuality but he wasn’t backing down. As he folded his arms he looked at her and smiled. “Stop, you’re going to prom. So remember when I was in college before the academy. Well I joined the LGBT alliance and I know someone.” He pulled out his phone and began to text someone. A few moments later his DGI new phone lit up and he smirked. Scrolling through social media he pulled up a picture. “This is Nina Caine. She’s a lesbian and a friend of mine. I explained the situation and sent a picture. Well she’d love to attend prom with you Kelsey if you still want to go.” 

Kelsey picked up her phone and immediately went to Courtney page which she was done up and going to prom with Tyler Franklin. A piece of her was crushed. The girl she was in love with was hiding who she truly is. Then she looked at Zach and her courage retched up. Her brother wouldn’t be hiding or cowering. So she wouldn’t either. “Zach please tell Nina, I would love for her to be my date.” She said, looking at her brother and nodding her head. As she picked up her lipstick and began to reapply. “I’m not going to have my prom be a bad memory. Thank-you Zach.” 

Kelsey was silent for about a minute and the silence had everyone frozen. The memory made her body stiffen and rigid. “He protected me, he loved me so unconditionally that I will never have a love that pure again, romantic or otherwise. My big brother was a hero and he protected Miranda and the people of Atlas Falls until his last breath. So people will discuss how brave he was because he was bisexual and wasn’t afraid to be himself. I want people to remember the man that protected a boat full of people. The man who wasn’t afraid to bend social norms because he wanted equality for all. The man who got me a prom date when my girlfriend couldn’t be brave and big enough to attend the most important night of a girl. He called a friend and Nina Caine is still dear to me. He gave me bravery and an unrelenting determination to be treated like everyone else. My brother showed class when bigots hurt him and never wavered. So his fearlessness went through every aspect of his life as a cop, husband, brother, and family member. Please show everyone how brave we all can be and I suggest that we get the vermin out of Atlas Falls. To fight back against the violence that has plagued our community for years. We don’t have to live wondering when the next attack is going to be. It’s time to remove the violence, drugs, and pain that has permeated Atlas Falls. Thank you and I love you Zach.” Kelsey said as she walked down knowing he’d be proud, she hated speaking in front of people but she had to honor her brother.

**********

Lucy watched as Kelsey had come off the pulpit after saying goodbye to their brother and wondered how she would do the same. She was hardly even dressed for the funeral in her black jeans and black shirt, though her mother insisted it was fine, she felt out of place. Zach probably would have had a twinkle in his eyes at her at the outfit unconventional, something he always said was one of her best qualities. There also were a few circumstances where she hadn’t even returned back to her parents house for her things or a change of clothes. She came straight here from her release, at least she had made it in time. She bit nervously at her thumb nail on her good hand while she made her way up to the pulpit or was it a podium it had been years since she’d been in church. She saw the looks as she went up and shook them off. She was going to eulogize her brother and if people judged her for what she was wearing it spoke more about them than her.

“There are a lot of people here that loved and cared for my big brother, I know that he would have wanted that and my family appreciates that. For those of you that don’t know me I’m Lucille Fraiser otherwise known as Lucy and the designated black sheep of the family. I’m not pious enough for one side of the family and I’m definitely not proper enough for the other so I learned early on to pick my battles. Sometimes I felt like the most hated sibling or niece or granddaughter.” Lucy said seeing her parents look at her, her grandmother nervously looking away, she was pretty sure her uncle rolled his eyes. If Kelsey could come up and lament about how her life had been and Zach had helped her what was so wrong with her stating her truth. “The thing with black sheep’s is they’re unpredictable. I got well enough grades but not the A’s they always wanted. I liked to ride motorcycles and party. There’s also that tricky part of falling for the wrong boys or men that ended me up with time in the slammer. I was such an embarrassment to the family that to teach me a lesson…well that’s another story for another time and another place. My big brother though? Never backed down from being there for me.”

“Zach had a way with people and I was no exception. I wanted to go to a party. He made sure that he had eyes on me there or friends that had eyes on me. I got busted for underage drinking. He made sure that I knew I was well loved but needed time to sober up. I got that measly C in that damned art class I hated. He made sure to tell me that it didn’t matter that I wasn’t as creative as everyone else in the family. He showed up when I needed him the most when I called to say I had gotten into trouble.” Lucy paused, closing her eyes to fight back tears remembering that call when she had been busted and they stormed her office it felt like a lifetime ago. Her only phone call had been to Zach who assured her that he would make a few calls and be there, he kept his word dropping everything to come and even brought her lawyer cousin Braden too none of it seemed to matter in the end. “He was never embarrassed by anything I ever did. He just came so what do you need to know about Zach? He was devoted to anyone he cared about, even the family screw up like me.”

“So four years.” Zach saId pissed at his sister. “Four years and you’re going to sit in a prison cell. Lucy come on all you have to do is give away those people.” He saw she wasn’t budging and he wasn’t going to argue. “I heard you told mom um that you didn’t want us to come and visit you. Once a week Lucy. Once a fucking a week, you’ll be seeing my face. You need to see your connections beside these walls. We want a life for you. We need you free but if you’re going to do this Luce you gotta let us in. You gotta get a commissary, a phone card, and you gotta hear about Dani getting fat because she’s preggo now or how about Braden he’s married now. To Selina Delacroix. Come on Luce you know you want all the family dirt.” He said, smiling at her. “I hate to see you behind these walls. You deserve so much more.” Zach grabbed her hand. “Without all of this.” 

Lucy stared at her older brother, her arms folded. It had been four years into her sentence and she’d basically cut contact with everyone other than Zach. It was too hard to see her parents when they would come the looks of pity they gave her and worse disappointment. She had taken phone calls from her aunt. Yelled at Kelsey when she had visited. Brock had come too and she just simply looked right past him to the guards. She had refused Braden’s legal services and even Dani’s help after her arrest. She had fucked her life up beyond repair and she didn’t know what to do she knew what she was doing was wrong but it was the thrill of it all for her not to mention he was literally to die for. She didn’t snitch and now there wasn’t really a need to she was the one that was paying the price.

“I’m where I need to be Zach, I did what they said I did. I’m fine.” Lucy said  it wasn’t easy and she had been in more fights than she cared to admit but she had protection inside these four walls. Outside of them she wasn’t sure she would have that and she looked at her brother and the family drama that her aunt wouldn’t share with her did intrigue her. “Wait Dani’s like pregnant pregnant please tell me it is not with that smarmy pretentious asshat Lex. Also Braden got married to Selina? Finally, Jesus, he’s stupid waiting that long. Okay you know me too tell what else have I missed?” She paused for a moment to look at their hands and took a breath before seeing the guard give them a look. “I just can’t do it you know have everyone up here staring at me like I’m the screw up and mom and dad. I’m pretty sure if they keep coming it will send them to an early grave.” She finished halfway relenting with him; she wasn’t that bad she’d beg for soap yet.

“Then let me be your anchor.” Zach turned to look at the guard and without hesitation he grabbed her hand. “Let me keep you updated and if you can’t see everyone fine that’s okay but will you just let me keep you abreast of everything. Yes he married Selina and no it’s not Lex. It’s freaking Jackson Devonshire’s. She’s knocked up by Jackson fucking Devonshire and Walter isn’t taking it good but who cares what Walter is thinking. She’s happy and honestly that’s all that matters but I have to show you that you have a life waiting on you. I don’t know what you’re going to do with it Lucy, but I do know it’s big and beautiful. You aren’t the screw up you screwed up. That’s two different things and I want you to know your big brother will be here showing you every fucking week that you have something waiting on you on the outside these walls. Outside of prison.” Zach saw the guard staring at him and he shot him a look daring him to say something. “You’re going to be okay here. Our name and family will protect you. Walter is even running for mayor.” 

Lucy looked at her brother when he grabbed her hand and said he would be her anchor and she simply nodded at him fighting back tears. She had made so many bad choices in her life that had ended her up into the situation that she was in now, she did a double take at the news that her cousin was with Jackson like that was weird, definitely not as weird as Braden finally marrying Selina but still. “Good for her, maybe she’ll start living her life for her, not Uncle Walter. Braden has always been a little slow. Speaking of Uncle Walter, who in the hell decided that he should run for office let alone mayor?” Lucy said shaking her head a little bit of a chuckle coming out of her, her uncle as mayor had the town literally lost their minds the power trip he would go on. “I know I will.” Lucy said and then she saw the guard looking at his watch and then motioning to the clock. “Looks like time’s up, same time next week.” She said letting go of her brother’s hand while she walked back to the door seeing Zach wave at her and she did the same as it closed behind her.

“Once a week every week for a year, that was how committed Zach was to make sure I was okay. He made sure that money was on my account from the family that gave it to him, he made sure that I wasn’t going to lose myself behind bars. He was the one that I could face once a week, we’d always say the same time, same place next week. We won’t get to do that.” Lucy said wiping at her eyes as she did so they would never get that chance again and for her that was heartbreaking, that she’d never have a chance to meet and talk about shit, talk about their love lives or gossip about the family. She wrung her hands for a bit, the tissue getting crumpled while she took a breath. “He knew that people made mistakes you know but that didn’t define them, he forgave them. So big brother I’m going to forgive you for leaving us all too soon, knowing that you are in a better place with grandpa knowing that our visits will have to be every week at the cemetery from here on out. I love you and I’m going to miss you.” Lucy finished her hand covering her mouth as she looked at her brother’s picture and saw her brother and Kelsey come up to the podium to lead her back to her seat.

**********

Miranda had grabbed so many tissues during the service so far when Helen had called her earlier in the week to speak she hadn’t been sure she could, Mason had reassured her that it was something he wanted. As his partner at work Miranda had seen the same things that Zach had felt the same things that he did when they went out on a call. Things that other people unless they were part of the force would never know about or encounter. Criminals that needed to be brought off the street shooting at them and causing chaos in the projects, the homeless man that begged on the corner downtown by the courthouse who simply wanted hot food, the women that they had been called to help because of someone trying to take a part of them. The addicts that needed help or to sit in a car and be booked. The list could go on for days or months if she wanted to be honest, crime didn’t sleep and there were people that always needed help.

When she saw Lucy get down after what could only be described on her end as the most Lucy moment ever, if people didn’t know who she was before they did now. Miranda knew it was her turn rising from her seat in the pew she went to the podium with a hand written eulogy in her hand. Walking up felt like weights dragging her feet as much as she had told herself that none of this was happening and she looked out over the crowd, her eyes meeting her brothers who simply nodded at her. Giving her the courage that often had been up to Zach and she smiled warmly at that faint memory that nod of approval whenever they had an assignment and she just busted forward to do what needed to be done with no hand holding. That was who Zach was, someone that cared, someone that moved forward and got stuff done even when it was hard or difficult.

“Hi I’m Miranda Rhodes, one of Zach’s closest and oldest friends, not only that he was my partner. Zach had gone two years ahead of me at the academy, I had instead chosen to get married right in the middle of my sophomore year in college much to the chagrin of my parents, Zach and his cousin were the two at my wedding. A year after that I had my daughter, Quinn was barely a few months old when my world was rocked to the core and we all assumed that my husband KC had been killed by Ronan. It was Zach who had come to me when I called Dani in tow. He pulled me up out of the darkness and reminded me how strong I was even when I didn’t feel it.” Miranda said seeing KC look at her with tears in his eyes and she wiped at her own for a moment remembering how weak she had been back then. “He helped me pick out the casket, made arrangements for me to come home and sat with me to help me fill out the paperwork at the academy. I graduated near the top of my class and being the daughter of Richard Harrison you have no idea the roadblocks I took to get me stationed within the department. Zach fought for me every step of the way, even going to the captain and my retired father to tell them to put him as my partner.”

“Being married to a cop is hard. I can’t even begin to tell you what that is like and the issues that it comes with but what you learn to do is rely on their partner to keep them safe. Zach lived that faithfully every single day that we went out together to watch my back consistently to make sure that I returned home every night to Quinn and now her and KC. He took that oath seriously time and time again no matter what we faced on the street or on assignment. I would like to think he thought I did the same for him when he was with Mason, even now we had no idea what was going to happen two weeks ago. I hadn’t seen it until it was too late, but up till that moment we both had one goal. Do our jobs at work, help people when needed, get criminals off the street and finally return home after every shift safely. There is no one at the department or the force that Zach gladly wouldn’t have taken a bullet for. He was honorable and good natured, he wanted to help. The one thing he sucked at making a pot of coffee. Though none of us had the heart to tell him that we dumped it in that fake plant by the captain’s office every day.” Miranda said seeing Devin breaking out in a laugh and her brother along with a few other officers, not to lighten the gravity of why they were there but to remember who Zach was it was okay to cherish those memories and keep them close. “He was also really funny and was always cracking jokes, he’d want us to remember to laugh. It was good for the soul.”

“I’ve actually wondered how good of a partner I was actually over the last two weeks before I came up here today. Did I do a good enough job if he’s not here? I’d like to think his answer to that would be a resounding yes. I was there when he passed, told his last goodbyes to his husband and will make sure that his son when he comes home knows exactly the kind of man that his father was. Brave, courageous, strong, a warrior through and through. Loving and caring everything that one could wish for to serve the people of Atlas Falls. He was an immaculate friend, brother, cousin and son and the light he shone is going to be forever missed.” Miranda said looking at the sun shining in through the window and her mind wandered to another time and another place.

“Suspect turning down Lafeyette Dr pursuing on foot.” Miranda said into her radio while she chased after the suspect in the early morning light Zach slightly in front of her.

Who robbed an elderly couple near a seven eleven at seven in the morning who was just trying to enjoy their morning walk and coffee. Apparently a dumbass criminal, that was who, someone dumb and daft enough to hold them up with what was reported a gun inside the store as he robbed the cashier too. Regardless they had about another three blocks before they were deep inside the Scottswood area where they would need backup. They had minutes, maybe more before they needed to call in backup or at least maybe she thought they did. The next thing she knew was she turned her head to hear a gun going off and her ass promptly landing on the asphalt underneath her. What happened next could only be described as an adrenaline rush as she looked up seeing Zach gun drawn shooting back at the suspect and she watched as the suspect hit the ground. Once down she made her way over turning the suspect and pressing her hands against his wound while Zach cuffed him. It was then she noticed he was bleeding.

“Zach you’re hit!” Miranda said pointing to his arm and hearing the sirens down the street finally back up was there and then she looked over at Zach pressing her radio again. “Suspect is down. Fraiser took him out after he shot at us first. Bleeding from his shoulder looks to be through and through, also Zach got himself a gnarly wound, send an ambo if you haven’t already.” 

“I’m alright.” The adrenaline of the moment had him going strong. Even though it felt like a burning hot fire poker had slid into his shoulder. After watching Miranda cuff the suspect, Zach stepped back and grabbed his shoulder looking at Miranda he could tell she was concerned. “My first bullet wound, wait until I show everyone. My scar will be prettier than all of those other losers.” Miranda’s fear of this moment felt palpable. “I’m okay.” He said looking into her eyes. “I’m good Miranda.” Zach just took a moment to feel the relief that the bullet didn’t hit anything vital. He was scared because depending on where it hit, he might be out of commission for a period of time.

Gripping his shoulder he heard the ambulance getting closer. “My chariot is right there. So no need to freak out. Plus I’m going to get the hero’s treatment for a month. This is the golden ticket.” He said sitting down on the curb because the blood was coming out faster. He was getting a little light headed. “So, have you read any good books lately?” Zach teased with a megawatt smile. 

“No you’re not, you’re bleeding.” Miranda said, making sure the suspect was still comfortable and alive, tying her makeshift bandage around his shoulder before making her way over to her partner, taking off her belt and tying off the blood from his arm. Only Zach Fraiser would be cracking jokes about a damn scar in the middle of an alleyway close to the Scottswood neighborhood. Her ass still hurt from landing on it earlier when he had shoved her down taking a bullet for her and she looked at him. “I would have returned fire, you know. I do know how to operate my firearm.” She said looking at him and seeing him shoot her the I know look before she sat down beside him hearing the sirens getting closer.

She glanced over at him lately. She was on one of those dark romance books kick, or in the words of her best friend smut was good, sometimes the best fantasy. Seeing how she hadn’t been with anyone with KC it seemed to fill her needs. “I mean if you count hot men with women with some darker undertones, seeing how I don’t have time for that in my actual life. Dani says it’ll be good for me. There is also the serial killer novel I picked up, not quite as spicy though. Listen I know you take that partner stuff seriously but I can handle myself. Besides, maybe I wanted a scar too.” Miranda finished knowing that she was probably harsher than she needed to be about it but she did respect Zach he’d been doing it longer than her.

“Fine next time I’ll let you get shot.” Zach said again, smiling at her. “Hey wonder woman I know you can kick ass. I just went off instinct to protect someone who means the world to me. You know that right? You’re my best friend right along with Dani. You have a daughter, my goddaughter if I remember correctly so no bullets for you right now. She needs you and I think Quinn would kick my ass if her mom came home with a GSW. So I’d rather take one from that idiot than Quinn. She wouldn’t miss.” He laughed seeing her face light up thinking about her daughter and how close they all were to something serious happening. 

“Hey promise me something. If anything happens to one of us we won’t be all sad or some bullshit like that. Remember me just as I am because everyone crying over my grave? God that’s no fun. When I die, I want a party. I want a huge damn party, don’t forget that. I want dancing, and singing. Not crying and weeping. So, when I’m ninety and old as shit you better get your old ass up and dance, get me?”

Miranda looked out at the crowd again relishing in the memory of their first arrest together and what Zach had told her he wanted for people to dance and celebrate at his funeral. She desperately wanted to honor that with him, the circumstances of how he died though seemed to hold her back from doing so, almost like it was cruel to do it. To dance while someone so well loved, someone so respected had passed away so senselessly. No warning, or hell even reason at this point in everything. Just because the mob didn’t ever sleep on what they wanted and the violence they caused they didn’t care about the innocent people that were caught in the crossfire or left behind. The destruction that walked the streets in Atlas Falls where they went and spread their crimes, drugs, gang battles on the Scottswood side, stray bullets and bodies. 

“So what you need to know about Zach was he was loyal to those around him, gave everything everyday to make sure that me and everyone at the department got home safe. He was selfless when it came to doing or helping others. And like Kelsey said, he was the life of any party, always living his life to the absolute fullest overcoming any mistake he made along the way.” Miranda said as she heard some music starting to play in the background she looked over at her brother in the crowd and KC. “He’d want us all standing and dancing. Remembering who he was and the life he lived so we should honor that. Or at least that is what I’m going to do.” When she finished she heard Lynyrd Skynyrd’s, “Freebird” playing somewhere in the audience if she had to guess a fellow officer who knew how much Zach was into rock or country anything with a beat really. She saw Quinn get up from the pew while she stepped down dancing to her daughter as she did so before wrapping her arms around her and then KC before rejoining them in the audience.

**********

All the words said and spoken about his husband felt heavy as Mason looked up at all the speakers, each sharing about Zach in their own way trying to offer him comfort along with the rest of Zach’s friends and family. It was a sombering service one he was pretty sure that Zach would have loved for the eulogies hated for the lack of a party to finish it out, except Miranda’s. Honestly a party sounded so futile given the way that Zach had been stolen from him, from all of them the cruel way that in mere seconds his life was over. When Miranda stepped down and the church got eerily quiet he wasn’t sure what else he was supposed to say or do. Both Pastor Jenkins and Father Kreja looked at him solemnly and he felt a weight tied around his feet as he made his way up to the pulpit. Not even sure what he was supposed to say or do, he still wasn’t ready to say goodbye and he wondered if he ever would be.

“Thank you all for coming, I know that Zach was well loved and respected by everyone that knew him but seeing you all here for me and his family…it means a lot. The past two weeks have been a living hell without him, losing him the way I did.” Mason started his voice cracking and trailing off, not sure he could form the words he remembered seeing Zach’s body at the hospital burnt and charred the wound from the explosion. It was horrific. He would never forget the smell or how he had collapsed by the table eventually having Selina lead him out of the room or how he lost it at a clearly shattered Miranda. He then remembered how he had seen Dru at the hospital and scanned the crowd making sure that she did what she was supposed to, staying the fuck away from Zach’s funeral. “We shouldn’t be here, Zach had planned a party for next week and that is what we should be doing.”

He paused again, taking a breath, remembering how he and Zach had planned the party in surprise. The invites were supposed to be going on this week. Their goodbye party since Zach had been accepted into the FBI training program and he was going to announce they were both moving to DC. He choked back a sob, covering his mouth and then shaking his head no when Selina moved to come up, they had so many plans.

“So care to tell me what you are thinking.” He splashed Mason with the water. “Is it about how you’re going to decorate our new home? I was thinking of doing a kids room for Kieran. My director has informed me they will be doing everything to get my son back.” It had been almost a year ago since he applied for the FBI and they had been giving updates on Scarlett. A possible sighting in Peru, and Amsterdam. She was in Europe and he knew that. He knew that she would be with Patricia friends and family hiding out. “I wonder does he even know that we are looking for him? Does he know how much we love him. He’s my son and I don’t know him and I want so badly to know how he is. What does his laugh sound like, does he like Spongebob? Or is he a Mickey Mouse kid? Like she truly is taking from me and I know she’s a criminal and I know she’s wrong but this is cruel. I deserve to have him as well right? I deserve to feel his warmth at night and when we do find him. Will you do me a favor? Will you adopt Kieran with me? I think he’ll need your love as well as mine.” They had one week before the casino and a month left before they relocated to DC. 

“I was also thinking about a little girl and boy. One adopted and one you have.” He said looking at Mason. “I want you to have a biological connection to one of our kids you know? So we adopt one, have Kieran which is mine and our daughter is yours. What do you think? I know three kids is a lot but I want a family with you. I want to be dad and you’ll be poppa or something? What do you want to be called?” Wrapping his arms around Mason he kissed his neck. “How are we in this water and you taste so good.” He kept kissing until Mason burst into a loud roar which he’d lie and say was a giggle. “Giggling again right? That’s a snort laugh hybrid.”
 
Mason was thinking about how leaving would change everything for them, how they’d be starting over in a completely different city, how Selina, Ophelia and Jamal would stay behind. He was thinking how they’d no longer make Sunday dinner once a month at Lauren’s, how Zach would be leaving all his extended family. That he’d be leaving his best friend and DGI, though he had a feeling that Jackson would find a way to retain him as a lawyer. How Zach would be leaving Dani, his best friend and cousin. How Zach would be leaving the entire force and everyone that he had worked with over the last decade of his career, how it all would change. Not that change was a bad thing, change happened everyday of the week every hour and minute it was natural. He also was deciding on which house they wanted to put the downpayment on, Zach told him whichever he decided he was fine with and seemed to embrace the fact he had money to spare in their marriage. He was broken out of his thoughts when Zach splashed him and started to talk about Kieran.

“I would like to think that he knows how much everyone in your family prays for that boy to come home. How hard you have looked for him I’d like to think the universe is telling him. I’m thinking how hard it’s going to be to tell them all after the casino opens. Like they’ll be happy for us I’m sure, but we’ve both spent our entire lives in Atlas Falls, this is pretty huge. How do we know DC will be as cool as here?” Mason said only partially teasing and he did have to half giggle and roar when Zach kissed him clearly trying to set the mood. He shrugged, getting clean only seemed to make them both smell better after a long day of work and he leaned back kissing Zach’s lips with his own. “I mean yeah why not you know? Kids are something we both wanted, always have and I want to be Kieran’s dad with you and we can adopt. You’d really do that for me let me be the donor if we got a surrogate, I never really considered that you know?” Mason said looking up at Zach the bubbles in the tub floating around them.

“What? A little girl with Selina and your skin? Duh it’s not even a question Mason.” He looked at him. “Being a interracial couple isn’t going to be easy. I’m an Irish Catholic and you’re a southern Baptist but we will do it together baby. You know that and I wouldn’t feel like our family is complete if you didn’t have a biological link to one of our children.” His words about Kieran made him smile and feel warm inside. To be honest he wanted to believe that Scarlett was showing him all the love she could. Then a painful fact ate at him. Scarlett didn’t love herself so how would she teach someone how to love? “I want you to have our daughter or son or whatever they want to be but you will have a biological kid.” Taking Mason’s hand he kissed it. “I want a mocha baby as well as my Irish rugby star.”

He was jolted back to the now after the memory one he wanted to hold onto and not let go of, he would never let go of that memory or the fact that they had been planning a life together. Instead he seemed to be haunted by the stolen moments that he would have back, the ache in his heart and soul where Zach had been. In some ways he thought the funeral and remembering would be cathartic in a way, a way for him to heal instead it seemed to open the gaping wound he felt more. Nothing was helping ease what he was feeling and looking at everyone expecting him to say or do something was too much. He felt too much, his breathing increasing and before he knew it he walked off the pulpit and through the doors of the church, taking in the sight of the cars lined up outside with the motorcycles ready to guide his husband to the cemetery. 

He’d had panic attacks before, especially in college with the life he had been living in the closet. He’d gotten help for them but this was different. He hadn’t had one like this in years and he closed his eyes, sure he could feel his heart racing in his eardrums with a steady stream of panic. His lungs gasped for air while he tried to calm his breathing only he felt his chest getting tighter. So much pain was inside of him, clawing and tearing its way to the surface to the ugly truth that he wasn’t ready to face, the fact that Zach was gone. He shook his head leaning down a bit and felt someone touch his shoulder and he turned his face to the hand looking at Ophelia. ‘I don’t know if I can go back inside there.” He said to her almost pleading in a way.

“I don’t want you to regret this Mason.” Ophelia said with a softness. She was going to marry Tony and if he didn’t get that horrible letter then they would have. Honestly she wanted to know what it said to this very day. After that day it seemed like Tony got his affairs in order and two weeks later he took his own life. Grasping Mason’s face she looked into his eyes. “You faced off against Anthony Delacroix there is no way you won’t face this. You are always a first priority to me. But I won’t let you not say goodbye because you’re hurting. So look at me son. Look at me I will walk you back in there. It’s over Mason, we are going to say goodbye one last time and it’s over, baby.” She’d raised Mason since he was seven years old and he was her son as much as Jamal. She took his arm and held him up as she walked him back into the church. 

Gloria watched as Selina grabbed her hand. She couldn’t help but to feel a twinge of jealousy seeing the comfort that Ophelia gave Mason. In that moment she truly saw the connection between them and she didn’t like it one bit. He was her son and she just had a moment with him. Now here comes Consuela acting like she was his momma. Gritting her teeth she looked over at Jeremiah who shook his head. He knew her well because she was fuming. Jackie and Ophelia were placeholders but she was his true mother. She gave up her children and never thought someone else would be in her shoes when she returned. But no bitch could wear Gloria Beecher’s shoes. Nobody could be her and soon Mason, Ophelia, and Selina would see. She was back and here to claim her throne as the matriarch of this family. 

**********

Mason looked at all the people at the funeral and he wasn’t sure what to say to any of them so many people were at the cemetery, all of Zach’s family and his friends and the amount of officers that showed up was astonishing. He had barely held it together inside the church earlier when Ophelia had to bring him back inside. He had stood numbly while the casket had been placed into the hearse with the bagpipes playing, sat silent in the limo ride to the cemetery as the procession happened. Once there though and seeing everyone he was near tears again as he felt Helen gripping his hand and he looked at his mother in law, his eyes meeting the close friends standing beside Zach’s casket.

Helen looked at the casket draped with the American flag over it and she watched her hand gripping Mason’s as she looked at Jon, Miranda and Devin participating in the ceremony. They’d followed the casket to the cemetery after the bagpipes had been played outside the church as her son had been solemnly loaded into the hearse and she felt like at times she and Mason were holding each other up. The horse on the sideline, no rider and she fought back the tears. She wasn’t even sure that she heard what Father Kreja was saying as she then watched pastor Jenkins do the same. Her eyes remained on her son’s casket and she felt Brandon ‘s hand on her shoulder. She felt Brock’s hand on her other shoulder and she felt a sense of relief through the pain.

Kelsey placed the flower down on her brother’s grave. Before she knew it her eyes began to pool with tears. It was as if she was having an uncontrollable reaction. She felt Willow’s arms around her holding her up. Her legs had somehow become jello as if her body was no longer connected with her mind. Turning to Willow she buried her head into her shoulder and began to weep openly. Kelsey had cried but at this very moment she felt the dam break. Nothing would ever be the same her big brother was gone. She loudly gasped as she continued to weep openly and freely. She fully expected to hold her poise. Her perfection but at this moment she couldn’t. She couldn’t handle it, her hero was gone. 

Selina lowered her head as Pastor Jenkins began to pray as the salute began. Tears began to fall down her face. Her brother was broken and nearly broke out of the funeral only thirty minutes later. Wiping her face, her lips quivered as she held onto Elliot. God she didn’t know how to comfort her beautiful brother. The man she knew with the biggest heart. Gripping onto her man she just exhaled because this was one of the most heartbreaking things they’d ever had to face together. She thought losing her daddy was hard but Zach made him feel again after Tony suicide. Now Selina would have to repair him but what was left. Selina and Elliot hand and hand placed a flower down. 

Jackson stood behind Dani and wrapped his arms around his wife who was crying profusely. Losing Zach felt like a stab in their relationship. He truly saw that he loved her because Zach was there after the kidnapping. He supported him after his rehab stint and he honestly found out about Dru. Zach was their guardian angel. Placing a rose down he looked at Dani. “It’s time Dani put the rose on him.” He whispered in Dani’s ear wondering if she would be alright. Would she be able to deal with this?

Dani had held it together for most of the service, honestly she was glad that the twins weren’t there by the time they walked out to all the cars though and into the Devonshire limo the tears just flew down her cheeks. Looking at the casket at the cemetery when they brought it out the tears wouldn’t stop and she felt Jackson holding her and was a little shocked her father had joined them too. This was so awful and tragic, her cousin was gone, her deepest friend was simply gone. She’d been so lost in thought she had barely heard when they started the salute started only for the gunfire to cause her to jerk and jump back to reality. She made her way to the casket and looked at it when Jackson told her to place the flower down she did numbly while she held onto him walking her back to the rest of her family and she watched as her father, then her mother stopped and did the same before rejoining them.

Braden looked at his sister breaking down and hugged her before he nudged Tamara and Dylan to the casket Delilah in his arms. He twisted the rose in his hands for a bit before he leaned down placing the flower there and wiping the tears away, his cousin was gone. He hugged Dylan as he placed his own down and drew him close seeing his sons heart shatter at the emotions. He watched as Tamara did the same with her own flower and he pulled her close to him kissing forehead and watching as she did the same to their teenage son who embraced it. Even though he thought he was grown he knew that today Dylan was still a child and this hurt, he walked back to the side taking in the weight of it all.

None of this was remotely fair or even Lucy thought as she watched it all unfold the final moments they had with her brother’s body. She looked over at Mason who was stoic almost like he didn’t know what to do and her heart ached for him wondering how as a family they would overcome this. She watched as Kelsey and Willow had gone up to the casket to place their flowers down and hugged her sister on the way back. Walking slowly she made her way towards Zach, her footsteps feeling heavy with each one she took. Once there she bent down looking up at the picture as she placed the flower down. “Till we meet again big brother.” She said once she stood though it felt like that was the moment for her it broke and she started to sob walking back to the side before joining her grieving sister.

Brandon looked down at Helen holding out his hand to her as he helped her up from her seat he watched as Brock and Greer joined them. Walking to the last resting place of his son he placed his flower down, tears cascading down his face. His wife was no better, her eyes bloodshot as she placed her flower down and the sobbing that radiated off her body was unbearable a pain that he couldn’t heal. He didn’t have words, there were none for ache and the gaping hole that was now in their family and he knew that hole may never heal. He heard them starting to play TAPS and looked over at his eldest who nodded to him that it was okay and he could take Helen back to her seat.

Brock stood tall and proud for his little brother, Zach knew the risks they both did in their respective lines of work in this case Zach went out a hero. He deserved a heroes burial and he was getting one that was enough for him and he gripped Greer’s hand in his own while he watched his parents break down placing their flowers down, he saw Greer do her and then bent down taking a moment to take it all in before placing the flower down and crossing himself touching Zach’s picture one final time. Making his way back to his family he saw them all breaking and did the same weeping openly. He glanced over at Mason who still hadn’t moved and his eyes met Jon Harrison’s and he simply nodded they could fold the flags and move on to the end of watch. If Mason needed more time he could have it to say goodbye.

Mason watched as the Fraisers and his own sister had gone up to place flowers down and yet he was still frozen even as the flag was folded and his eyes filled with tears. It was all too much for him to take in; he barely heard what was or wasn’t said when Jon had given one flag to Zach’s parents and then him as well. His breathing became heavy again and his lip quivered at it all. Eventually he stood up and clutched the flag to his chest walking to Zach’s casket. Closing his eyes as he heard Zach’s badge number and his name called the three times, to silence on the other end, he collapsed to his knees grief pouring out of him in sobs and before he knew it everything around him went dark and he wanted to just stay in it as he drifted off to another world.

He was inside a house, the one that he and Zach had picked out in D.C. the sunlight was shining through the windows casting a glow on the dark hardwood floors. He could hear laughing and giggling turning around and he saw a boy before him, Kieran playing with some action figures on the floor, his smile lighting up when he saw him. The boy turned his attention to the other two children on the floor younger than he was and he saw the most beautiful little girl hair braided no doubt Selina or even Gloria had done it to Naomi the little boy next to her had his features and a hit of his father’s, Brian Anthony. He let out an exhale as Kieran came over and hugged him and he looked over seeing Zach still there holding the morning paper as his husband smiled at him.

“I thought I was in a nightmare, you let me sleep too long babe, shouldn’t you be at work? The kids at school?” Mason asked, hugging Kieran and leaning down to do the same to the other two children playing on the rug. He turned his attention to Zach on the couch before joining him and kissing his lips, they were so happy. The house was perfect and they were planning another big move back to Atlas Falls, DC had been good to them but most of everything was packed into boxes. “So how did the interview go? I know Jackson is eager to get me back at DGI.” Mason said hoping that Zach got the job in Atlas Falls they would be fools to tell a lead FBI agent no.

Zach had been on ZOOM to do an online interview with none other than Miranda. It was easy and she offered him the job which was obvious. Going from the FBI to back to local authorities was going to be an adjustment. He was used to going around the tape and now he’d have to play by the rules. However he’d always colored outside of the line. Looking over at Naomi who was shaking her braids feverishly to hear them clack against each other. Laughing he picked her up as he looked over at Kieran and Brian Anthony wrestling on the floor. His husband and he both chose to stay working because it was good for the kids to see their parents working. Gloria had given each child a damn trust fund. They didn’t have to work but he wanted them to. He didn’t want to raise entitled children but he wasn’t also opposed to enjoying the money either. He wasn’t like the rest of the Fraiser’s he’d married rich and he loved it. 

“Well you’re looking at AFPD newest captain.” He said smiling as he walked up to Mason grabbing him by the hips. “You are so handsome.” Kissing his husband, he could hear Brian and Kieran gagging playfully as they started to run away. Rolling his eyes he saw his princess Naomi smiling brightly at them. At least they had their little girl who appreciated the love they shared. Picking up his daughter he blew raspberries on her belly. “You are so stinking cute you know that?” She wiggled into Mason’s arms. “Oh you running to dad? Like he can save you? He can’t save any of you.” Zach stormed around the corner and scooped up Brian and Kieran jumped on his back. Looking up at Mason. “This is perfect. Just us.”

“I always knew Miranda Rhodes was smart, honestly I’m surprised they didn’t offer it to Jon but grateful you know? We can head home, have the kids grow up around your family and mine and it’s going to be great.” Mason said looking at Zach he couldn’t be prouder. It felt right for them to head home and get out of the busy life they had created for themselves. “Just us for now. Just you wait till everyone is over at our place all the time.” Mason said smiling at him leaning in for another kiss only for him to hear a groan and he turned to look at Kieran who had taken a seat at the counter.

“Do you guys have to be so corny all the time? It’s like, so not cool.” Kieran said looking at both his dads and his siblings.

“One day when you are older you will understand. Duty calls, okay everyone backpacks and shoes.” Mason said as he looked down at his phone timer that was going off on the counter.

He reached for his cup of coffee as the entire kitchen broke into their usual morning chaos getting Kieran to school and then Naomi and Brian Anthony. Zach would do pickup after a boring day at the field office so that he could stay late for briefs and if court ran late this was their life now. He watched as the kids grabbed their backpacks. Zach sliding their lunches except Kieran into their bag, he preferred the school lunch. He’d never trade it for anything and he leaned into Zach.

“I’ll see you after work.  They’re gonna be late but I love you. We can celebrate, maybe I can even convince Selina to come with Elliot or Jamal for the weekend and we can have a night away?” Mason, seeing Zach’s eyes still light up years later, did something to him that made him fall deeper in love. “Have a good day, okay and nothing crazy. Tell Darnell I mean that.”

Zach couldn’t make any promises his current partner Darnell was more insane than anyone he knew. He however loved his family and flirted with Mason all the time although he was straight. He said he’d flirt with any of his partner wives. Why would it be different because Zach had a husband? Picking up Brian and Naomi watching Kieran putting himself in the carseat. His life was fulfilled and he felt so happy. His husband, his kids, and they were moving back to the city that they initially fell in love. “You have a good day Mason. Remember I will always love you. Forever and ever and ever.” 

Gloria stood watching her son on all these machines. Ophelia said it was exhaustion but her baby was broken. Her son was fighting a broken heart and she knew she couldn’t fix it. As she wrapped her arms around herself she could hear voices so pure and innocent. The choir from the church had come down to sing to Mason. All she could hear was the powerful voices here to soothe her child. Her beloved little boy. The little boy who she always knew was a little different. Now had become the man that brought so many people together. Turning to look at Selina’s fearful expression. She approached her daughter and wrapped her in her arms. Then began to sing with the choir. “Amazing grace, how sweet the sound, that saved a wrench like me.” 

Selina turned her head and released. For the first time since Gloria had returned she crumbled into her mother’s arms. As she heard the song echoing behind her wails. Mason and she had been through hell the last two years. Losing their father and now Mason lost the love of his life. She could feel Gloria rocking her back and forth. “I was lost but now I am found.” Elliot arms hugged them both and she released wondering if her brother would be alright. He passed out in front of the casket and for the first time she saw that nothing would ever fix this. No words or love she could give would heal Mason. 

Jackson’s eyes glowed as he looked at his best friend. Still unconscious and would awake alone without his person. All of this had put in perspective how close he was to losing his family and marriage last year. Dani handed him a coffee cup and he stroked her face. “I don’t know how I’d move on. If I ever lost you Dani my life would be just as bleak. I know we’ve been in a rough patch but today makes me see more than anything. I can’t live without you and I don’t want to.” The choir voices were pure and he just wrapped his arms around his wife. “I was blind but now I see.” That his life without this woman wouldn’t be worth living.  

Kelsey sat in the middle of Willow and Lucy as she looked over at her sister. She just gripped her hand wondering if this was too much for Mason. Right now honestly he didn’t deserve this. None of them deserved this. She just placed her head on Lucy’s feeling Willow’s hand squeezed her own. How did they just go on living when a piece of their heart had been snatched away? She cleared her throat and for the first time in a long time she sang a hymn with the choir. “Twas grace that taught my heart to fear, and grace my fears relieved.” She just held Lucy and knew that they couldn’t fear life without Zach. They’d have to cherish and truly revel in his legacy.

Brock had made sure along with his sister and Ophelia that Mason was simply exhausted; he had shocked everyone when he had passed out at the service. His mother and father were sitting vigil with Gloria of all people by Mason’s side and he pulled Greer to him watching her hold BJ. This was what he would do to honor his brother and be a good man. Be a good husband to Greer and father to his son, pass along everything he knew that Zach had taught him. The hymn seemed to relax him while he heard Greer humming and joined in. “How precious did that grace appear the hour I first believed.” It was all he could simply murmur to honor his brother; he had to believe there was a reason.

Mason knew it was peaceful where he was in the world he and Zach had imagined. Zach was still there, he was happy here and then the light began to fade and he heard a faint beeping, singing and his eyes were then blinded by fluorescent lights. He glanced over at the monitor as he saw a nurse and then Ophelia move to take his vitals. He saw his mother’s relieved face and that of Zach’s parents, and glancing over their shoulder he realized the entire service had moved into the emergency room of St. Christopher’s all for him, all in support of him and what he had lost. He had lost so much, he knew that nothing would be the same but somehow seeing everyone there was comforting in a way.

“The Lord hath promised good to me, His word my hope secures. He will my shield and portion be. As long as life endures.” Mason sang quietly looking at all the people around him and realizing what those lyrics meant. He still had people to support him and be there for him, Zach’s family was there for him they had blended their family. Life was going to endure as much as he didn’t want to face it, he wasn’t alone in it. Zach would want him to face it with everyone around him, he glanced over and he swore that he saw a glimpse of something that looked like Zach and he closed his eyes opening them and it was gone, like it was never there. “Forever and ever and ever.” He whispered to no one in particular but Zach who he felt like was still with them just not physically anymore.